Bob Fleming
Tommy Sue:
It is with reluctance and a great deal of fear and trembling that I have decided to post this message. I realize that I am taking a chance here and I hope and pray our friendship will endure.
First of all, let me say that I apologize that I did not have the experience or maturity in our early years to pick up on your gender fluidity realities. Some sixty years ago I recall a discussion in elementry school about the possibility of joining the Cub Scouts. You replied that you thought Brownies or Camp Fire Girls looked like more fun. At the time, I thought this was another example of your offbeat sense of humor. Later, I considered it to be an early manifestation of your long, abiding interest in the "girls." Now I understand it as an early expression of fluid gender realities in your life. I am sorry it took me so long to catch on. I think my classmates would agree that in many ways we failed you.
Also, I want to say that I admire the fact that you posted your picture on the forum for all to see. As a social worker by training, I admire that you have "come out" - if only partially. I understand why you would both "reveal" your true nature while preserving an "out" by still maintaining that Sue is not Tommy. I think I can say that therapists would urge you to go ahead and go all the way and revel in both of your identiites.
You an trust us; we are your lifelong friends. We support you and admire your bravery in coming forward as you have.
In future, if I should meet you in your persona as Sue I promise to behave accordingly. I would simpy walk up to you and say, "HI, I'm Bob. You must be Sue. How do you do?"
This is a Jungian moment. You can revel in your Sue persona and activate your anima or conversely, revel in your Tommy persona thus realizing your animus. You are Janus. An Integrated Soul. You have realized the Highest Potentialities. Congratulations! Please know that we will accept you in future; however you decide to present yourself.
In closing, I hope that you take up David's offer to meet him Friday at 11:30 in Richardson. I urge you to do so. If it will help, I would be happy to be thee in a spirit of solidarity, brotherhood/sisterhood, and friendship. Just say the word and I'll be there. I say this in all seriousness.
Meanwhile, with high hopes for the future, I remain . . . your friend.
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