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David Cordell

Ford Releases New Safety Feature Where Car Shuts Off If A Woman Gets In Driver's Seat

LIFE·Jan 28, 2023 · BabylonBee.com

DEARBORN, MI — Ford Motor Company is set to debut an innovative safety feature for all new models, where the vehicle will instantly shut off if a woman is detected in the driver's seat.

"Countless garage doors will be saved," said Ford CEO Jim Farley. "We believe this incredible technology will do more for car safety than seatbelts and airbags ever did."

Ford engineers have worked for decades adding countless features in a vain attempt to overcome women being awful drivers. "We made back-up cameras, bird's eye cameras - we even made sensors to warn women when they were about to smash into the garage door. All to no avail," said Rob Arnett, Director of Safety. "Then one day, the thought occurred to me - why have I been beating my head against the wall trying to make a car safe for women to drive, when I could just make it so women can't drive at all? Thus, the idea for our patented 'Woman-Lock' technology was born."

According to researchers at Ford, the addition of "Woman-Lock" will allow the removal of several now-unnecessary safety features such as collision prevention. "The cost-savings will be astronomical. We have also heard from State Farm that cars with 'Woman-Lock' will get a ninety-percent discount on insurance premiums," said Mr. Farley. "I personally can't wait to get it installed on my car. There's a curb on Jones Avenue that will be able to sleep a lot easier at night."

At publishing time, "Woman-Lock" was undergoing further testing after a vehicle failed to shut off when Assistant Secretary for Health Rachel Levine got in the driver's seat.

Wayne Gary

David,

Good posts.  It did not mention the otheramendment that did not pass set the House of Reps at 1 member for each 30,000 number of residents, If it had been ratified there would be over 6000 members of the House.  After the now 27th amendment was ratified the congress killed the possibility of the unratified amendment from being ratified.

The original first amendment (not ratified) read:

"After the first enumeration required by the first article of the Constitution, there shall be one Representative for every thirty thousand, until the number shall amount to one hundred, after which the proportion shall be so regulated by Congress, that there shall be not less than one hundred Representatives, nor less than one Representative for every forty thousand persons, until the number of Representatives shall amount to two hundred; after which the proportion shall be so regulated by Congress, that there shall not be less than two hundred Representatives, nor more than one Representative for every fifty thousand persons."

Had the amendment been ratified, the number of members of the House of Representatives could by now be over 6,000, compared to the present 435. As apportioned by the latest Census, each member of the House currently

Lowell Tuttle

David.  There was a dog barking, which interrupted my understanding of the amendments.   Was that your pooch?   Or was it the announcer's.   It was hysterical.   I had to answer the phone before i finished.   Renewing a widow's home insurance....

Back to work...

David Cordell

Lowell, that was Becky, the Little Black Dog. You may have heard Martha "shushing" her.

Anyway, I just thought it was a hoot how the amendment ended up being passed.

Hook 'em Horns!

David Cordell

Anyone know anything about this?

https://www.fastcompany.com/90839421/andi-google-alternative-chatgpt

https://eogn.com/page-18080/13079543

https://andisearch.com/

Steve Keene

I got a call from Jimmy Baker yesterday.  He called just to inquire how I was doing with no other agenda.  It sure is nice to know there are people that really care about you.  We talked for a least a half hour.  We both agreed that at our age,  possessions and self promotion should not be what defines who we are.  We concluded that eleemosynary endeavors of time and money should define our waning habitation in the flesh on this planet.

Steve Keene

David,

Don't you know you can't teach an old trickster like Lowell about new dogs?

Lowell Tuttle

David, either 60 minutes or CBS Sunday Morning was all over that this past week, or just this past weekend.

The story was a little disheartening to me.   

Not only is everyone else able to type as well as I, but they are able to think as well as I.   And, they can express me?  more eloquently with no effort.

I guess you could enter, "Create a 300 word essay on what Lowell Tuttle has to say about buying homeowner's insurance in Texas."

That would be the end of my insurance diologue on the subject.

Jim Bedwell

Chief Obfuscator,

I had to look up roberteleemosynary.

Chief Agonizer

Jim Bedwell

Now on the Cowboys website we have the headline "Cowboys Hopeful Dak Remains QB 'For 10 Years' ". 

I'm hopeful that Dak is gone as soon as possible, but with his contract, even if dumbbell Jerry wanted to, it would be extremely difficult to pull that off. And Jerry's saying that they need a new kicker. I'd rather have K Brett Maher on the roster next year than Dak.

I can see why our former OC & play caller Kellen Moore wanted out, and the Cowboys agreed to release him from the last year of his contract. Moore saw the everyday goings on in Jerryville behind the scenes.

And our mediocre head coach McCarthy is going to be the play caller now? 

I'm going to make a prediction for next year's version of this team - and as I see it, likely not even this will happen. Anyway I think the team will perform not as well as it did this year and so AT BEST there will be only 1 playoff victory and then elimination once again, for another wasted year with no NFC championship game appearance.

David Cordell

From The Washington Times, February 1, 2023:

Recent polling confirms that Virginians strongly favor protections for the unborn at 15 weeks, with exceptions for rape, incest, and to save the life of the mother. That includes 64% of Independents, 55% of rank-and-file Democrats, and 56% of women. Even 60% of likely pro-choice voters agree.

This puts our commonwealth in good company with virtually the entire modern world. Forty-seven out of 50 European nations limit elective abortion at 15 weeks or earlier — most around 12 weeks. Even left-leaning Finland and Germany place at least some limits on abortion after 12 weeks, similar to what Americans consistently say they want.

David Cordell

Watching the movie Groundhog Day -- again. Such a clever concept that the title is part of the lexicon. It is a great story of redemption

Steve Keene

Chief Blackchitlineater,

iYou need to revisit history to find that Usgrantseleemosynary as a tax deduction.

Lowell Tuttle

While looking up to see if eleemosnary is a real word, I came across another word which fits Steve just fine.

agathokakological

Though I suppose it fits about everyone.

Steve Keene

Lowell,

You don't have to be short with me.  As a Catholic on a Friday, I want you to know that ono is not a no no. Sounds a lot better than a jif sandwich.  

Chief Yahoo of the Wahoo

P.S.:  it is eleemosynary.

Jim Bedwell

Chief Ranger Supporter (since you don't pay it forward anymore),

I also looked up chitlins, since I had heard of them forever. Here is one definition:

"Chitlins, also called chitterlings, are the large intestines of swine (hogs) but can also come from calf or veal."  YUK!!!!!

Chief Agonizer

David C,

"Groundhog Day" is one of the best movies ever made. GREAT screenplay. And I do like the way the Bill Murray character's motivations evolved over (his) "time".

Lowell,

Exactly. HOWEVER there was ONE AND ONLY ONE exception for agathokakological thinking and behavior - Jesus Christ.

Jim Bedwell

After Jerry Lee Lewis died last year, since each of my parents descends from 1 of the main, but different, Lewis families originally from Wales (it's not known exactly which Lewis family that Jerry Lee and his cousins Mickey Gilley and Jimmy Swaggart are descendants of, but we all descend from the same Powell-Place marriage), I did some exploring and found that he is/was my 9th cousin, once removed. Which means that his 3rd wife (of 7), one Myra Gale Brown, is my 10th cousin since she, at 13, married her 1st cousin, once removed, Jerry Lee, then 22. She also had 2 of his kids (he had 6 total), the first at age 14, one Steve Allen Lewis (1959-62 - drowned in the family swimming pool in Memphis - I bet I know whom he was named after). Jerry Lee's 2nd divorce was not finalized when they married in December 1957 so they remarried later in the middle of 1958. Also Jerry Lee's 7th wife & widow was first married to Myra Gale Brown Lewis's brother, Rusty Brown (no known relation to our classmate Rusty Brown). And to think, none of these people (at least that I know of) ever lived in Appalachia!!! Go figure!!

David Wier

Here's my take on the Cowboys:

Maher had 1 bad game and they're going to get rid of him.

Prescott had an entire bad season and it looks like they're going to extend his contract. I guess they want to see what the record for quarterback fumbles and interceptions can be.

BTW - from what I've heard and seen, Prescott's last 2 best seasons ties the best 2 seasons Romo had. 

Jim Bedwell

David W,

PRECISELY!!! Plus I saw on-line that some commentator was saying that Dak never threw interceptions like he did last season. But I checked it out on pro-football-reference.com and ONLY his first season in 2016 did he not have excessive interceptions per pass attempt. Not to mention all the consistently inconsistent passes where he's (usually under pressure but not always) throwing behind, above or ahead of the intended receiver. But Jerry, STUPID GM as always, is sticking with him AND head coach McCarthy. Too bad Sean Payton is the new Denver Broncos coach, as always IMHO. In Jerry's mind apparently they just have had an assistant-coach problem in the McCarthy regime.

Janalu Jeanes (Parchman)

I just heard Lt. Gen. Kellogg speak on our newscast that the "weather balloon" sent by Communist China over our air space was known about for weeks before it got to our air space, yet nothing was done by our Pentagon or Biden, to shoot it down.  Now it is over central US, and still nothing is done about it, due to Biden's assumption that it could fall on humans or human habitats.

Biden is the stupidest president we have ever had, and is also super weak in his actions.

Does anybody on this forum agree?

I can't believe what I am hearing from the Lt. General this morning, as he says that he is furious too, just like me.

He says that that balloon is known to be a surveillance balloon, travelling over some of our most important military weapons silos, and he says he thinks Biden and the Pentagon have made a foolish error by letting this balloon continue.  He says that the metal bottom on the balloon's attachment is gathering much info and immediately sending back info to China.  He indictates that this action by Biden is extremely irresponsible and allows the Chinese to gather info from deep into our ground, where our missile silos are located.

He is talking with other military officials who agree with him in his analysis.

So, does anyone here have a response?  Or should we just talk amongst ourselves about good times at Ridgemont High?

Antony Blinken has postponed his trip to China.  Blinken shows a little action, albeit rather weak.  At least, something!

Sorry to sound irritated today.  As Pelosi would say, "I'm worried about the children".........and survival of us all.  Guess I should read the funny papers and drink a stiff drink; not bother others with serious matters.

Kurt Fischer

Janalu:

I was very bothered by the Chinese balloon when I heard the news.  Later yesterday I read a comment which made a lot of sense.  I've read a bunch of articles on Fox about the risk to our country, but this puts it in a bit of perspective.  Every day we have Chinese spy satellites crossing over our land.  Each satellite has equipment which can observe and record in great detail.  Based on this, the Chinese balloon doesn't present any incremental capabilities that we don't already know about and mitigate.  The balloon is a real irritant and has a public relations impact, but doesn't offer any additional spy capabilties that the Chinese don't already have.

I think this is why the Pentagon is not as bothered about it as the pundits are.

Steve Keene

Janalu,

Biden is the Manchurian candidate and his claim that someone on the ground could be hurt by a shot down balloon is ludicrous.  I know that part of Montana very well and he at most would endanger the life of a prairie dog or an antelope.  If that is such a danger why are not all hot air ballons grounded?  They are heavier with thicker membrane and have heavy wicker baskets that will supportt several people.  He is getting a payoff for allowing that balloon to spy on us and the whole country knows it.

Janalu Jeanes (Parchman)

Kurt and Steve,

Thanks for weighing in.  I appreciate you both.

Kurt,

Lt. Gen. Kellogg and a couple of others from former security positions say that they fear the Chinese are testing our president on just how much they can 'get away with' when pushing the envelope with him.  Apparently, he can be pushed a LONG way.  Every time he sits and twiddles his thumbs, they laugh at his lack of making a decision.  Many say this kind of action or inaction illustrates why they didn't push Trump around very much at all.  They actually had some fear of Trump.  Biden, to them, is a pushover; a joke of a leader.

Pompeo says "We should have shot the balloon down before it entered our air space, or, at least, over Montana, as Steve says, where there are wide open expanses."

These men also say that all the other countries are watching and noting this incident too, like, for instance, Russia and Iran.  Biden needs to develop a spine and act like China doesn't have him by the short hairs, or that they are controlling him with blackmail threats, which many of us fear.

Also, I've heard some pundits say that maybe this is a 'trial run,' before the Chinese launch some type of weapon that can explode at a high altitude with a force that could fry our electrical grid.

Every time I see Biden approach a microphone, I cringe at what aburdity he is going to utter.  Surely, he will NOT be allowed to run again.

David Cordell

To Kurt - if the balloon doesn't add anything to satellite data, why launch it, unless it is to test the boundaries of American resolve?

To Taiwan - if sleepy Joe won't pop a Chinese balloon over our own airspace, do you really think he will come to your rescue??

Kurt Fischer

RE. the balloon wars...

I have to agree with both of you this was a stunt by the Chinese to test US resolve.  And to put egg on the face of the US.  I earlier described it a PR stunt, but that description was probably too weak.

My primary point was the balloon would not gather any more intelligence than existing Chinese satellites and did not seem to present an immediate intelligence threat.